All of us know that taking time for ourselves is a
good thing; we’ve all heard of the phrase “me time”. But how many of us
actually do it? Stress and overwhelm is one of the most common reasons that people
seek therapy in the UK. Those feelings of stress are the response to a
situation, or a range of situations which tell us that we need to take
action.
When we ignore those feelings of stress, telling
ourselves that we just need to get our work done or the kids to school, we feel
productive. Society rewards us for keeping on going. However ignoring
those mounting feelings of stress can be deadly, warn researchers. A study
published in the European Heart Journal
found that people who reported high levels of stress to the point where they
were concerned that it was affecting their health were twice as likely to
experience a heart attack as those who reported that they were unaffected
physically by stress.
September 6th is National
Read a Book Day. Reading, more than some other
pleasurable pastimes has been linked to lowered stress levels and other health
and social benefits. However, regularly
making time to do something that you find absorbing and relaxing is an
excellent way to reduce stress levels and increase feelings of well-being. The
act of taking time to yourself to engage in an activity that you find rewarding
is enough to lower your stress levels and give you a new lease on life.
If you struggle to find time for yourself because
you’re busy taking care of others, you might want to re-prioritise.
Perhaps you could designate the washing up to someone else and take an hour or
two on a weekday evening to absorb yourself in a book, rather than watching
TV. Or maybe substitute your weekend newspaper full of doom and gloom,
with a novel. Joining a book club can be
a great way of committing yourself to reading a book which you’ll later discuss
with others. This provides a sociable outlet and accountability that makes you
more likely to read the chosen publication and attend.
Many of us feel guilty when we take time for
ourselves. It can feel selfish.
However, taking that time for self-care means that we can be more
present and less frazzled in other areas of our lives. Often when we feel as
though we have no time for ourselves it’s because we aren’t prioritising
ourselves. How many things in a week do you say yes to when you wish you
could say no? Perhaps you could make a deal with yourself to leave work exactly
on time just one day a week or say no to the request to make 200 fairy cakes
for the school fete. While it might feel
uncomfortable at first, you’ll grow to love the difference in how you feel as
you have more time for yourself.
Many people who come to see me have trouble saying
no to others. This could be because of self-esteem issues, or because
they were brought up in a family where they were expected to take on the lion’s
share of household tasks. This habit, whilst pleasing others around us,
is detrimental to both our health, happiness and even success.
If you want to learn the art of saying no or to
find a way of making more time for yourself and your interests, hypnotherapy
can be a useful tool. In my practice I regularly see people who want to
learn to prioritise themselves higher in their to-do list. To find
out more or arrange a free consultation, please
get in touch.
